35 weeks

26 weeks

The other day Brooke began having pretty strong feelings in her belly from Olive.

(Now, I know Olive is not actually in Brooke's belly but in her uterus. I like the thought, however, of Olive just floating around inside her stomach. It actually could be a messy thought. We choose to think of it as having a lot of room where she can kick off one wall and float to the other.)

Anyway, I'm happy that she's moving around in there, but I can't feel it yet. It's a little bit of a bummer because I want to. This whole pregnancy thing is still a bit distant for me and though we get the occasional ultrasound, I am looking forward to the moment I can participate in the realness of Olive.

I'm excited for Brooke, she's doing such an amazing job as a mother-to-be. She's very fun with it. One of my favorite things is how involved she has Olive in the little things (Olive apparently loves certain foods and drinks, she reprimands me sometimes when I'm not being nice and she's vocal about her mother's need to rest or be helped with something). There's even a little voice that's heard when Olive chimes in. I love it.

Brooke has been through a lot with this little baby. Her morning sickness went unannounced to friends and family. We had a very trying and frightening miscarriage threat. Through this Brooke has been strong. She's dealt with sickness and worry with grace. I'm sure there have been mothers throughout time who have faced similar trials and I know that there are those who have faced far greater heartache and sorrow. But this is Brooke's time and she has been such a selfless woman. I am humbled by that. I've really learned that it takes a lot to be willing to bring a child into this world. It does take more than I initially thought. Brooke has shown me how willing she is to be a mom. It's been scary sometimes and I know she worries, but she's been amazing.

The night we thought we were going to lose our baby, I remember being in the emergency room. The doctor told us he was trying to find the baby's heartbeat. I remember thinking, "Please be strong, please let me hear that little heartbeat." And then we could hear it. I was so happy. Olive was so strong. I love her so much for being strong. It was a scary moment. I'm glad little baby Olive was so much stronger than I was.

Yes I'm pregnant, and yes I'm far enough along for us to have found out today that we're having a girl!  Chris and I did things a little out of order, to say the least, and we've been through some real heartache as a result. But we've taken care of business, if you will, and now we're on to the part where we can just be happy! We had a little wager going before we found out today - Chris said if it's a boy I have to do 5 things he tells me to do without saying no and without arguing, and if it's a girl he has to do 5 things I say. I won the bet; I seriously knew it was a girl! And I'd had a dream about it too. I can't wait to see her and be her mommy. We've already settled on a name - Olive Michelle Barragan. Olive because I heart John Steinbeck and his mother's name was Olive. Michelle because my sisters and I have a tradition of giving our oldest daughters our middle names as their middle names. I suppose there's a chance we could change our mind about the name before she actually gets here at the end of January, but we really like it so I doubt it. We're super happy and we can't wait to see our little girl!